Cats and Their “Social” Life

*This post may contain affiliate links for which I earn commissions.*

Cats Level of Social Engagement Varies Significantly

Cats often get labeled as solitary, standoffish, indifferent, or just cold. This is not really very accurate. Many cats do like their “me” time and space, but most enjoy some type of social interaction. The type and level of interaction is where things can really get interesting.

Males and females are equally friendly and affectionate for the most part. Males are at times more gregarious, out going, and interact with a wider variety of social contacts than their female counterparts.

Social contacts might include other cats, dogs, other pets, humans, and outside creatures. Cats are predators so a cat and bird friendship would be very uncommon, but certainly possible. Most kittens will hang, play, cuddle, and groom with their siblings and mom. However, as they mature this dynamic often changes. The siblings that we have kept usually still hang out at least some of the time if they are both male or male and female. I have never seen two female adult cats hang out together, cuddle, and groom each other. This does not happen even if they are siblings.

Now our sample size is somewhat limited, but over the years and working and living with dozens and dozens of cats I can’t recall ever seeing two adult females together. It’s not as if they hate each other or anything like that. They can certainly be in somewhat close proximity of another female, but the interaction is not very warm and fuzzy. It seems more courteous and polite.

On the other hand, the males are very cuddly with other males and females alike. We will daily see two sometimes three cats sleeping together, grooming each other, or just hanging out together. “Together” indicates some physical contact is included in the interaction. Females will be chummy with certain males, but not other females. Males are perfectly fine with cramming into a smaller space with another male or female.

The level of social interaction seems to fall into four groups.

There is the super social cat. This cat is usually male. They love to interact with just about everyone. This type will spend time with a number of different cats both male and female. They also love social engagement with most humans even if they are strangers. This super social cat will often have a favorite human, but will respond and react to most anyone. This group also greatly enjoys dogs. They seem to really be drawn to calmer more mellow dogs. This type of cat will head towards the front door with their dog friends when the door bell rings. Most of the other cats are running away from the door and looking for a good hiding spot. You could say this type of cat almost acts more like a dog than a cat. We have had several “dog cats” under our roof.

The second type are the cats that pretty much just hang out with one other cat and one other human. They are somewhat open to another human, but not always. These guys can be male or female. The female cat’s choice will only be a male cat. We have had a couple of male cats that were real stinkers with other cats, but for some reason a particular female would be attracted to them and the male would treat the female friend very well. This is notable because they often interacted with all the other cats in a less than positive approach. and would usually be avoided by the rest of the cats. This type is quite social, but with a much smaller circle than the super friendly cat.

The third social type is one. One human or one other cat, dog, or other animal. That’s their buddy, friend, and companion. They may spend a chunk of time alone, but they do have regular and lengthy interactions with their chosen one. So this group is either off alone or with their buddy. This group also starts to get nervous when there are any groups together which can include cats, dogs, or people. They like their space and their one friend.

The last group just have one human friend. They are not in the least bit interested in any other animal for a buddy. They might tolerate being near other cats and dogs, but prefer not to be. The interaction with their chosen human can be fairly light but consistent, or it can be quite intense and very affectionate. This interaction can be something in between as well. Also their interaction is usually at least daily if not multiple times of day depending on the cat and the relationship. This is the cat that you will often see alone and assume they are not friendly. Well, usually they are friendly, but just with one person.

I mentioned previously that I have never seen two adult females hanging out together on any kind of regular basis. I have also never seen any of our cats NOT hang out with somebody. They either spend time with a human, another cat, dog, or somebody. I have never seen a cat just want to be alone all the time. Now sometimes a rescue starts out that way, but eventually, they all find a friend somewhere, somehow.

Cats are way more complex than most humans realize. They are very smart, can be very social, and can be a great friend. I have bonded with several over the years and they all have given me so much joy, friendship, and affection. I can’t imagine my life without any of them.